It’s That Time Again

Hi Everyone,

NaNoWriMo is approaching rapidly, less than two weeks to go!  I’ve been contemplating what to write my next novel on, barely coming up with ideas.  Perhaps I should have thought about this sooner, but you can’t turn back the clock. I’ve been stuck on one idea for a while now and I’m just going to give it a try. I’ve shared it with one person, and his response was “that’s interesting.” Honestly, I don’t know how to take that.  Usually when I person calls something “interesting” it’s because they don’t like the idea but don’t want to be mean by telling the truth. Anyway, I thought I would present my next idea to my readers and see how you felt about it. If you have suggestions on how to improve it, I would really appreciate the response.

So here it is:

A Lawyer goes to Hawaii with his wife for a 2 week vacation. He doesn’t wish to go back home, so stays in Hawaii. His wife leaves him there, after failing to convince him to come back home.

The Lawyer takes to living in a van on the side of the road in Hawaii (Oahu). He spends his days surfing and coaching kids who come by to surf. In return they get him lunch/dinner.

Maybe some instances of the lawyer getting arrested and spending the night in jail. – work with me here, I’m trying to add some conflict 🙂

He coaches one kid out on the waves, an 8-year-old, who quickly becomes a good friend. The boy finds out that the lawyer is living in a van and brings him home with him.

The 8-year-old fights with his mom for a few days, trying to convince her to let him stay with them. He pulls his last card – he’s my only friend! His mom caves and lets the lawyer stay with them.

The lawyer starts to realize how much of a bum he has been, seeing this woman (the boy’s mom) working so hard to keep her family alive and well. In exchange for her gratitude, he goes off and gets several different jobs. He tries a variety of jobs (I haven’t decided what yet – I want him to try random things he wouldn’t have done before) until he decides the only thing he’s passionate about is being a lawyer. He gets a job for a non-profit law firm in Honolulu.

The lawyer starts to earn enough to move out into his own home. In the process, he finds himself falling for the kid’s mom. When he finally decides to move out, him and the kid’s mom reveal their feelings for one another. The kid gets angry and runs away.

After a week of searching for the little boy, they find him (where? not sure yet). They sit him down and talk with him about how great their life can be together. Nothing would really change, things would be more peaceful instead! After much arguing, the boy accepts it and goes home with the two. Not sure how to end this – maybe just them walking off hand in hand (all three) finally at peace with the way their lives are going?

****

Before I wrote this post, my story was actually different than what you see above. It’s amazing how your story runs away from you as you’re typing.  I know this one is a bit cheesy, but I wanted to give it a try.  I want to write something a little happier than my last one and something I am a bit more familiar with.

-Renee

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About Renee

I'm a self-published author searching for her place in the publishing industry. I seek out inspiration through yoga and the world around me to transcribe into my writing. I work retail in the daytime and escape into my writing at night.
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5 Responses to It’s That Time Again

  1. Eric says:

    If you can avoid the inherent cheesiness as much as possible and avoid sounding like Pay It Forward (for some reason the premise reminded me of parts of that movie) then I think you have some potential, yes.

    It’s a good arc – strife, turmoil, and a happy resolution. If you can pull it off it should be a good read.

    • Renee says:

      Oh boy, I did just see that movie recently. I felt like some of the plot line reminded me of something, and thank you for bringing to light what it was. I’m going to have to rethink this.

  2. Annie says:

    Unless the lawyer has a background of surfing (BIG PLOT POINT) and has been going through a time in his life where he wants to make a drastic change (marriage sucking would explain wife just leaving him instead of working things out like adults do, job feeling dead-end would take care of quitting his job out of nowhere, middle aged for the life-change, etc etc), the idea of a lawyer just dropping everything to live in a van that he gets out of nowhere (and yet he has no money for food or somewhere else to stay?) is convoluted and childish, in my opinion.

    This doesn’t even touch upon an adult being taken home by an 8 year old. While it’s a cute idea and very sentimental, I feel like you would have a hard time keeping the friendship from feeling off in a way that only “my only friend is an adult hobo” could.

    The love story just puts the whole thing over the top, and not in a good way. Yes, I’m sure the two adults would grow together, probably over their mutual caring for the boy. And yes, perhaps you could write this into a love situation. BUT, an 8 year old boy becoming angry when the two other people in his life finally want to live together seems there just for the drama. Children get upset unduly, yes. But I would have assumed the boy would be more upset by the lawyer moving out rather than his mother finding happiness with someone the boy already loves too.

    And an 8 year old being missing for a whole week is just… I can’t even word it rationally. The word dumb is all I can think of for that plot point. They would be crying themselves to sleep and have the authorities out looking for the boy, not casually thinking about their situation while their friend/son could very well be dead.

    I realize this is only the main storyline, but based solely on it, I wouldn’t read it. I would probably avoid it. Too many questions and implausibilities that lend itself to an over idealized children’s book, rather than a novel. Working out the details, perhaps it could work. But just from this, sounds like it has a long way to go.

    • Renee says:

      Annie,

      Granted this is an outline, a lot of what you mentioned would be cleared up in the actual novel (for instance, I was thinking that the lawyer would be going through a mid-life crisis, so stressed out with his job as many lawyers are that he realizes how happy everyone is around him in Hawaii and how happy he is on his vacation that he decides to leave his previous life behind).

      Thanks for your opinions on these plot points. I was hesitant about bringing love into the equation, but I wanted to challenge myself by attempting to include a topic that I’m not experienced with writing about. I’ll keep in mind the possibility of it throwing the story completely off.

      Maybe a whole week was a bit long for the kid to run away. Perhaps 1-2 days would be more realistic. I do feel a kid would react this way to this love story out of pure jealousy.

      I’m sure this outline is going to change drastically. I had to test the waters and see what would make the most sense for the novel.

      I do appreciate your comments, but I don’t feel a real critic should use words such as “dumb” to describe their opinion on a particular plot point. It’s not constructive criticism. But, at least it shows me how strongly you dislike it.

      -Renee

  3. Pingback: Fleshing out NaNoWriMo Details | Zaggitybomp's Blog

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